My Thoughts Today.

It’s weird how my emotions changed over the last couple of days. I still love you unconditionally and I will until the day I die, but my approach is so different than before. I’m not scared, or at least not as scared as I was. I’m sure about everything. The feelings I told you I get in my lower back when I had those thoughts of breaking up, it’s totally different now. I want to stay and stay forever and I’m sure of that now. You should see me when I think of marrying you. The excitement. The joy. I saw myself in the mirror while I was laying in bed and I have never been happier in my life. I reach over and kiss your picture at least two times a day. I think about you having my baby all the time. I realized all the reasons why I thought I wanted to leave and I don’t want to leave at all. I was worried that things would change between us because of me, never because of you. The distance seems like so much sometimes but it’s really just a holdup to what I believe is inevitable, and that is us spending the rest of our lives together. The longer I stay the easier it becomes to see, the more I want it to happen. All this time in between us being together is supposed to make us stronger and I hope that is the case. I’m not deserving of a woman as beautiful and wonderful as you are. The fact that I could even think of leaving you is unbelievable to me now. We’re only 19. There is so much more we have to experience and learn in this world but I don’t care about any of that because I want to spend every single moment of my life by your side. That is what is important to me. I never want you to be with anyone else but me, and I never want to be with anyone else but you. These thoughts and emotions that I feel for you I never want to feel them for anyone else. I will never hurt you and I hope that we stay together for the rest of our lives. Please never give up on us.

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