I’m really happy. It’s not excited happy, but genuinely. I can’t explain it.

She believes I could fall in love with someone else, I don’t see that happening. I understand what my mom’s friend said when he told me I need to talk to other girls, to make sure I know what I want. I haven’t done that. Part of me still doesn’t want to, but maybe I have to just to make sure. I don’t know about that. It’s okay to have girls that are my friends, there’s no problem with that. I’d just rather have her and only her.

She said, “As long as we are together I will never love anyone else.” That’s all that matters to me. I had to ask, “If something happened and we broke up for awhile, could you replace me?” She said, “No, I don’t think so.” I don’t think that’s true. I’m not irreplaceable. I wish I was, but I’m not. She is to me though. She’s my bestfriend. She’s the only person I want to be with. She’s the only person I want to love. Maybe I shouldn’t think about it so much. She isn’t. So why should I? I don’t know. I’m as confused as I am happy. That’s okay though. I love her and she loves me. That’s all that matters and that’s all I want.

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