Why does she love me? How can she? I want to be with her so badly. I feel like I’m searching for something that it is right in front of me, I just can’t grasp it because she’s 560 miles away. It’s there. I know it’s there. She’s goofy, and she’s free, and she’s happy. She’s everything I want, and everything I need. I love her. I really love her. I trust her with everything. Even certain things I wouldn’t tell my own mother. I am inspired by those that have lasting relationships. I envy those that are married at times. Commitment. That’s what I want to be able to have with her. A love that never goes away no matter how much time passes or how hard and complicated things get. It is not easy, and perhaps that is the point. I don’t know. Maybe I should think about it so much. Maybe the biggest part of making a commitment is not the goal you intend to reach, but the process of getting there. Looking too far ahead causes things to go awry. I have to fall in love with the process of what I hope to be my final and greatest relationship. It takes patience and I’ve never done this before, trying is the most important part and never giving up. I can definitely do that for her. She is the love of my life.