I find joy in a lot of things that people would never pay attention to. Even the littlest things can make me feel something deeper, and sometimes I feel like even something as simple as which way path I take to walk back from class says something about the person that I am and who I’m trying to become. A smile, a deep conversation with the person I love, a period at the end of a text, a song, an album, a prayer, everything makes me feel something. I like feeling things. I just don’t like getting swept away by my feelings because then I’ll either overreact or shut down. I still love to feel though, I love who things make me think and shape me in different ways. It’s exciting.
I was walking back from supplemental instruction the other day and it was really dark out. I was listening to Drake, the
best only time to listen to Drake is at night, and there’s always these two paths to get to my dormitory here at school. The path to my left was very well lit, there’s street lights all the way down and the path to my right was very dark and it went under a bridge. I’ve told myself I’m only taking the well lit path to my left, because I didn’t want to be walking around the darkness, even though I feel just as comfortable doing so.
Realistically, it doesn’t matter what path I take to get back to my dorm. Either way I’d get back perfectly fine and in one piece. However, I feel like it’s symbolic in way. I have choice of which path I’m going to take just like I have a choice of how I want to love my life and how I want to be remembered. I have a choice of the type of person I want to be and what I want to stand for as an individual. I walk the well lit path because I want to walk in the light. I want to walk on the right path and I don’t want to stray into the darkness. I know what’s right for me, and walking around in the dark isn’t it.
I know it sounds crazy and dramatic, but it’s how I see things all the time.