It’s been awhile. I’m sorry I haven’t been posting, I’ve been living and it hasn’t been a priority to blog lately. Writing is better for me when I’ve actually lived my life and can go and write about everything, as opposed to always writing about my feelings, which I still love to do. I went on random rode trip to Atlanta and saw Lauryn Hill perform, and I went to my brother’s campus after we left a party that got busted and had a crazy party at his house. I’ve been having a great time, and I’m going to have more. I want to experience as much as I can in my life. Preferably together with Nicole, but until that day comes I’ll be living as best I can.
What’s been on my mind is Nicole and I. I’ve been feeling weird, which happens with the distance from time to time, and I felt really defeated. Waiting still sucks all the time. Not being together every day still hurts a lot, even though I’ve become better at distracting myself. I’ve reached the point where I’m ready for us to always be together. I’m ready for the distance to be over, but I still have to wait.
The thought creeped into my head, “why don’t you just quit?” and I absolutely refuse to ever do that. Nicole is my everything. She is my soulmate. Nicole is the love of my life. No matter what, I’m never going to give up on us. I don’t care about feeling sorry for myself, or how bad things get while we’re apart, I will always be hers and only hers until my dying day. That’s all I truly want, and what I believe is God’s plan for us.
I get to spend my birthday with her next weekend!!! I can’t describe how happy and excited am I. Once I see her face, I know all the bad feelings will disappear.